Life of a screw-up

DILBERT: "Of all the projects, I like the doomed ones best"

I posess an immense capacity to screw things up better than anyone else can. I also posess good ctreative talent to do new things.

Till now I think of all the things I've done in my life. The ones that I liked are all gone. Of course due to my mistake. All the things that I didn't like persist like roaches after a nuclear holocaust.

I used to do so many things when I was a kid. With my wheels (lego as all the retard kids call it there days) I used to do things that used to amaze my parents. I did things that were so good that it surprised me. All those days, and all the things had to pass into some dark ally of my past.

I had made painting that were good enough to be sold. I used to be an artist. But time ahd to wash it all away. I don't even know where those damn painting went either. I used to love them so much. I used to spend hours gazing at them. It used to give me such pleasure. Not the pleasure of appreciating myself. But the pleasure of all the things I could do. Much better than what i was seeing.

I used to do so many things with sticks and chalk and other things that are well known to be in the dust bin. Some how none of them exist now. All stay only in my memory. Bits and peices in other's big heads too.

My mind is an amazing place. If someone could actually peek into it, they'll be amazed at the things that exist there. I value the person I am. There were things I did that was good at times. But none of them exist. There was a person who they remember to be very good. But even he's gone to some alien land to write their software. I have always been my own hero. No one knows the things I've done. No one will either. Everyone knows bits and peices of me.

I known all the ingenious things i've done. I've known all the things i've seen wash by. I've known all the things i've screwed up.

The best parts of our lives are in our heads which unfortunately spends most of its time ignoring everything it has. Life is all about appreciating the things you've done and eventually screwed up. The value of an object is always better seen through its ashes.