I feel im in a very relationshippy place now and I like it. I adore my girl and it just feels good being committed. That is like the best thing that ever happened to me. Not only for all the koochie koo stuff but also on the broader sense. I've learnt so much about life...
We all spend our lives chasing a dream till we one day we realize that we were neck deep in it, but we just waded past it hoping to reach a bigger sea. I wanted so much out of life that I never realized it when I had it. When things turn completely ugly I realize that it used to be pretty before.
Its like the axiom of life... I remember the lyrics of 'affirmation' by savage garden which actually got me thinking about all these...
I believe in Karma what you give is what you get returned
I believe you can't appreciate real love 'til you've been burned
I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side
I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye
I used to listen to this band a lot once upon a time. When I got my computer and had around 50 songs...
In one of the many mails I used to recieve, I had once read...
(apparently the words of Swamy Vivekananda)
Love is like holding water in your palm. You try to hold it tight, it'll slip through your fingers
So savage garden + swamy vivekananda =
"Love is like holding water in your palm. You'll try to hold it tight till you squeeze the last drop out and you'll realize you shouldn't have done it till your mouth goes dry and u feel thirsty"
Sometimes we really start dwelling in cocoons of our own misery!
Apr 16, 2008
Apr 8, 2008
jackasses...
This world is full of sad people. At some level everybody is sad because nobody gets what they want.
I spent a big chunk of my life thinking that I did not want anything in life. Its just very recently that I realized that I ended up really wanting something. I always wanted to be happy by just relishing what I had. Its just recently I realized what it feels like to not get what you want.
Now its a lil tough to get back to the mainstage and laugh because the side curtains of the stage seem very comforting. This day surpasses everyone's life.
Let everone who's caused pain among others suffer what they've caused. Including me.
I spent a big chunk of my life thinking that I did not want anything in life. Its just very recently that I realized that I ended up really wanting something. I always wanted to be happy by just relishing what I had. Its just recently I realized what it feels like to not get what you want.
Now its a lil tough to get back to the mainstage and laugh because the side curtains of the stage seem very comforting. This day surpasses everyone's life.
Let everone who's caused pain among others suffer what they've caused. Including me.
Apr 6, 2008
Life of a screw-up
DILBERT: "Of all the projects, I like the doomed ones best"
I posess an immense capacity to screw things up better than anyone else can. I also posess good ctreative talent to do new things.
Till now I think of all the things I've done in my life. The ones that I liked are all gone. Of course due to my mistake. All the things that I didn't like persist like roaches after a nuclear holocaust.
I used to do so many things when I was a kid. With my wheels (lego as all the retard kids call it there days) I used to do things that used to amaze my parents. I did things that were so good that it surprised me. All those days, and all the things had to pass into some dark ally of my past.
I had made painting that were good enough to be sold. I used to be an artist. But time ahd to wash it all away. I don't even know where those damn painting went either. I used to love them so much. I used to spend hours gazing at them. It used to give me such pleasure. Not the pleasure of appreciating myself. But the pleasure of all the things I could do. Much better than what i was seeing.
I used to do so many things with sticks and chalk and other things that are well known to be in the dust bin. Some how none of them exist now. All stay only in my memory. Bits and peices in other's big heads too.
My mind is an amazing place. If someone could actually peek into it, they'll be amazed at the things that exist there. I value the person I am. There were things I did that was good at times. But none of them exist. There was a person who they remember to be very good. But even he's gone to some alien land to write their software. I have always been my own hero. No one knows the things I've done. No one will either. Everyone knows bits and peices of me.
I known all the ingenious things i've done. I've known all the things i've seen wash by. I've known all the things i've screwed up.
The best parts of our lives are in our heads which unfortunately spends most of its time ignoring everything it has. Life is all about appreciating the things you've done and eventually screwed up. The value of an object is always better seen through its ashes.
I posess an immense capacity to screw things up better than anyone else can. I also posess good ctreative talent to do new things.
Till now I think of all the things I've done in my life. The ones that I liked are all gone. Of course due to my mistake. All the things that I didn't like persist like roaches after a nuclear holocaust.
I used to do so many things when I was a kid. With my wheels (lego as all the retard kids call it there days) I used to do things that used to amaze my parents. I did things that were so good that it surprised me. All those days, and all the things had to pass into some dark ally of my past.
I had made painting that were good enough to be sold. I used to be an artist. But time ahd to wash it all away. I don't even know where those damn painting went either. I used to love them so much. I used to spend hours gazing at them. It used to give me such pleasure. Not the pleasure of appreciating myself. But the pleasure of all the things I could do. Much better than what i was seeing.
I used to do so many things with sticks and chalk and other things that are well known to be in the dust bin. Some how none of them exist now. All stay only in my memory. Bits and peices in other's big heads too.
My mind is an amazing place. If someone could actually peek into it, they'll be amazed at the things that exist there. I value the person I am. There were things I did that was good at times. But none of them exist. There was a person who they remember to be very good. But even he's gone to some alien land to write their software. I have always been my own hero. No one knows the things I've done. No one will either. Everyone knows bits and peices of me.
I known all the ingenious things i've done. I've known all the things i've seen wash by. I've known all the things i've screwed up.
The best parts of our lives are in our heads which unfortunately spends most of its time ignoring everything it has. Life is all about appreciating the things you've done and eventually screwed up. The value of an object is always better seen through its ashes.
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